john and VANDERPUT

This is a story about john and VANDERPUT.

john, as you would imagine from his nice, ordinary name, is a nice, ordinary boy; always polite, often humble, leads his life, never grumbles. He likes toast, translated literature, and questions he can answer on quiz shows. Sometimes he goes to the movies by himself, occasionally it’s the theatre. When it’s the theatre he buys one glass of lemonade at the interval, which they give him in a plastic cup.

VANDERPUT is different, a charmer, some might say a rascal. VANDERPUT likes going to places they don't let you in. He drinks two bottles of wine with a girl that he forgets the name of halfway through. He thinks it might be Merlot. He’ll produce a cigarette from behind the ear of his best friend’s sister and vanish it into her naked, upturned palm. VANDERPUT is the one invited to the weddings and the parties, john goes to the funerals.

VANDERPUT does card tricks for a living. Yes, card tricks. Stupid huh? VANDERPUT earns a lot of money doing card tricks for a living. But then he spends it quicker than it comes in. john writes. He sits in his room and writes. john can’t say much about the money, as his writing isn’t exactly setting the piggy bank on fire. Truth is, without VANDERPUT on stage every night, the whole operation would be in serious trouble.

Often john wakes up and finds VANDERPUT passed out on the carpet. john will have cereal for breakfast, VANDERPUT will pour cornflakes in the toaster. john will do the laundry, VANDERPUT will be sick in the laundry basket. And as VANDERPUT sprawls on the couch with a poptart in his mouth, john will retire to the bedroom and clack clack clack his keys, detailing the pain of living with VANDERPUT.

John and VANDERPUT, VANDERPUT and john; the necessary evils of the other's existence, and as the separate lives they lead become more separate by the day, they drift apart remaining too close together.