Coffee Beens

The problem with going solo for coffee is you have no-one to save a seat for you. When you swing through the doors, you're on your own man, the others? They have teams! They've got one man on queue, one man on sugar and cream, one taking a leak and the one guy all over the sofa area, just waiting for an early mover. You're queuing away all by yourself, ordering your coffee, trying balance your muffin on your book with your sandwich all the time moving down the line, musn't hold up the line, by the time they've made you're latte all the window seats are snapped up and you're left sharing a high chair with the broadsheet reader. And you can't take a bathroom break can you? Of course not, who are you gonna trust? There are vultures circling for any sign of a vacated four-legger, so you have no choice but to drink the full bucket cup of steaming hot coffee as fast as you can, pack up your stuff and pray you make it to the urinal. Real peace in a cup.